Friday, November 09, 2007

Indian girl born with eight limbs conscious, smiling after surgery

Canadian Press: THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

BANGALORE, India - A two-year-old Indian girl born with four arms and four legs regained consciousness Thursday, wiggled her toes and smiled at her parents, 48 hours after massive surgery removed the extra limbs.

Lakshmi, who has been revered by some in her village as a reincarnation of the four-armed Hindu goddess she was named for, is still in intensive care. But she is doing well as doctors slowly stop sedating her.

Dr. Mamatha Patil, Sparsh Hospital spokeswoman, says the girl also moved her arms.

Doctors are planning to take the girl off a respirator later Thursday but are still monitoring her closely during the critical 72-hour period following the operation.

Lakshmi was born joined at the pelvis to a parasitic twin who stopped developing in her mother's womb.

The surviving fetus absorbed the limbs, kidneys and other body parts of the undeveloped fetus.

On Wednesday, a team of more than 30 surgeons concluded the 24-hour operation, removing the extra limbs, transplanting a kidney from the twin and reconstructing Lakshmi's pelvic area.

Doctors said the complicated surgery was a great success, meaning she would not need further major reconstructive surgery. However, Lakshmi will need further treatments and possible surgery for clubbed feet before she will be able to walk.

Children born with deformities in deeply traditional rural parts of India such as the remote village in the northern state Bihar that Lakshmi hails from are often viewed as reincarnated gods. But some had sought to make money from Lakshmi. Her parents kept her in hiding after a circus apparently tried to buy the girl, they said.

Her father, Shambhu, who only goes by one name, said her family had been worried for her future before the operation and he was looking forward to seeing her with "a normal body."

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Neorhinos promise weekly Orgasms, Marijuana for all

Canadian Press: Alexander Panetta, THE CANADIAN PRESS

OTTAWA - Talk about a party platform.

The Rhinos are back and they're hoping to lure voters with the tantalizing promise of weekly orgasms - and marijuana in every pot. The Neorhino party promises to declare Spanish as Canada's official language and pass legislation forcing Prime Minister Stephen Harper to go on a diet.

They're proud of smoking pot, they draw their political inspiration from cigar-chomping comics and rock legends, and they want to get elected so they can stick it to "The Man."

The new party - officially called neorhino.ca - is one of at least two groups claiming to be a reincarnation of the defunct Rhinocerous party that specialized in political satire.

Like the old Rhinos, the party has no clear political ideology except for two deep beliefs: something's seriously wrong with the state of modern politics, and Canadian public discourse could use a lot more fun.

"We are a Marxist-Lennonist party - based on the philosophy of Groucho Marx and John Lennon," said party president Francois Gourd.

He calls himself "Yo" Gourd, which in French sounds just like "yogurt." He strode to the podium in the news-conference room near the House of Commons on Thursday sporting a cloth rhinoceros horn on his head.

The original Rhinos were founded in 1963 by Quebec author Jacques Ferron, and reached the pinnacle of their success in the 1980 election where they received 110,000 votes - or 1.01 per cent of the popular vote.

They never won a seat and stopped running election candidates in 1993 after an election reform law that stripped the party of its registered party status.

Gourd recently ran in Quebec's Outremont byelection and finished sixth with just 145 votes.

The party claims to have 600 members in 30 ridings - 20 of them in Quebec.

Among its other campaign planks: Replace soldiers' weapons with paintball guns; Create a national gas-barbecue registry; and replace the Defence Department with a Ministry of Laughter.

Beneath the thick veneer of gags, the party raises a serious point: people are so disenchanted with politics that almost 40 per cent of Canadians no longer bother voting in federal elections.

That, for the Neorhinos, produces a tantalizing bit of electoral math. If every single one of those non-voters were to cast a ballot for them, they could statistically hope to win a majority government.

And then: "We're gonna put The Man under the blanket for a while," Gourd says.

The Neorhinos admit some respect for the established political parties - including the NDP and the Greens. They say it's hard to like Liberals, and dismiss Conservatives as proponents of the politics of fear.

For example, they are no fan of the Tories' war on drugs.

"We are for the Marijuana party of Canada - and we inhale. And we enjoy it," Gourd said. "I am an illegal person. I have been smoking dope for 30 years."

They poked fun at the prime minister for saying recently that he struggles to explain the drug references in Beatles lyrics to his son, Ben. To them, it offers further proof of how dull politicians are.

But they want in.

"We're just joining the herd of the stupid, the idiots and the nuts," Gourd said. "When you have to explain Beatles songs to your children, something is strange."

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

You Are a Centaur

In general, you are a very cautious and reserved person.
However, you are also warm hearted, and you enjoy helping others in practical ways.
You are a great teacher, and you are really good at helping people get their lives in order.
You are very intuitive, and you go with your gut. You make good decisions easily.
What Mythological Creature Are You?

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

New York state church phone to call sex hot line

Canadian Press: THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

CLARKSTOWN, New York - A homeless man has been charged with breaking into an upstate New York church by picking a lock so he could dial up some sex chat.

The man, James Macnair, was arraigned Monday night before Justice Scott Ugell on charges of burglary, possession of burglar's tools and petty larceny.

He admitted he had sinned before, breaking into the Elim Alliance church days earlier for the same reason.

Police say a church treasurer found Macnair on the phone both times.

The first time, when he was in an office, she told him to leave but the second time, when he was in a basement area used as a nursery for children, she called police.

Macnair, 35, is being held in jail without bail.

Google